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# You'll Learn About Yourself The Hard Way
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We get frustrated with code that doesn't compile. We get angry with customers
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asking things back and forth. We get upset when upper management can't make up
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its mind. And we lash out on others when that happens.
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Unfortunately, that's the way you'll learn about yourself. You'll learn to
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figure out when you get frustrated. You'll learn how you can keep getting
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attacked by others -- even micro-aggressions -- but, without realizing, at
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some point you'll suddenly burst into an counter-attack that may seem out of
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proportion.
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The worst part of it all? Very few people will tell you what you're doing
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before it's too late -- you'll get in trouble way before you could actually
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understand what you were doing.
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But, again, you'll get in trouble.
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And you _must_ learn about these events. Take the feedback as true, even if
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you don't agree with it. I had my falls, and I always took it as something I
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need to improve, even if later I said to my psychologist that I thought it was
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unfair and biased -- mostly 'cause I'm the quiet guy that always took the
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blows and never complained about, and people taking the flak from me were more
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vocal and friendlier to the higher-ups. But, again, I took it as true, and did
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my best to work on those problems.
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