From 0a315913a36a60a93bf5feeff38fabfe96ad2dcc Mon Sep 17 00:00:00 2001 From: Julio Biason Date: Fri, 19 Jul 2019 19:26:41 -0300 Subject: [PATCH 1/3] New chapter: Learning about yourself --- content/books/things-i-learnt/_index.md | 1 + .../learn-about-yourself/index.md | 25 +++++++++++++++++++ .../books/things-i-learnt/not-done/index.md | 2 +- 3 files changed, 27 insertions(+), 1 deletion(-) create mode 100644 content/books/things-i-learnt/learn-about-yourself/index.md diff --git a/content/books/things-i-learnt/_index.md b/content/books/things-i-learnt/_index.md index dd43721..f5e1d81 100644 --- a/content/books/things-i-learnt/_index.md +++ b/content/books/things-i-learnt/_index.md @@ -78,3 +78,4 @@ template = "section-contentless.html" * [Learn To Say No](say-no) * [Take Responsibility For The Use Of Your Code](responsible-code) * [Don't Tell It's Done When It's Not](not-done) + * [You'll Learn About Yourself The Hard Way](learn-about-yourself) diff --git a/content/books/things-i-learnt/learn-about-yourself/index.md b/content/books/things-i-learnt/learn-about-yourself/index.md new file mode 100644 index 0000000..30595f7 --- /dev/null +++ b/content/books/things-i-learnt/learn-about-yourself/index.md @@ -0,0 +1,25 @@ ++++ +title = "Things I Learnt The Hard Way - You'll Learn About Yourself The Hard Way" +date = 2019-07-19 + +[taxonomies] +tags = ["en-au", "books", "things i learnt", "personal", "burn out"] ++++ + +We get frustrated with code that doesn't compile. We get angry with customers +asking things back and forth. We get upset when upper management can't make up +its mind. And we lash out on others when that happens. + + + +Unfortunately, that's the way you'll learn about yourself. You'll learn to +figure out when you get frustrated. You'll learn how you can keep getting +attacked by others -- even micro-aggressions -- but, without realizing, at +some point you'll suddenly burst into an counter-attack that may seem out of +proportion. + +The worst part of it all? Very few people will tell you what you're doing +before it's too late -- you'll get in trouble way before you could actually +understand what you were doing. + +{{ chapters(prev_chapter_link="/books/things-i-learnt/not-done", prev_chapter_title="Don't Tell It's Done When It's Not") }} diff --git a/content/books/things-i-learnt/not-done/index.md b/content/books/things-i-learnt/not-done/index.md index d0c062d..a086956 100644 --- a/content/books/things-i-learnt/not-done/index.md +++ b/content/books/things-i-learnt/not-done/index.md @@ -30,4 +30,4 @@ On the other hand, if you say "Almost, but there is this thing that bothers me and I think it may give us a headache in the future", they will understand. So be clear and transparent about your work. -{{ chapters(prev_chapter_link="/books/things-i-learnt/responsible-code", prev_chapter_title="Take Responsibility For The Use Of Your Code") }} +{{ chapters(prev_chapter_link="/books/things-i-learnt/responsible-code", prev_chapter_title="Take Responsibility For The Use Of Your Code", next_chapter_link="/books/things-i-learnt/learn-about-yourself", next_chapter_title="You'll Learn About Yourself The Hard Way") }} From 2943564062bfcc1da1c2e35c845b22962ccd1956 Mon Sep 17 00:00:00 2001 From: Julio Biason Date: Fri, 19 Jul 2019 19:38:57 -0300 Subject: [PATCH 2/3] New chapter: people that care are annoying --- content/books/things-i-learnt/_index.md | 1 + .../learn-about-yourself/index.md | 12 +++++++++- .../books/things-i-learnt/not-done/index.md | 2 +- .../things-i-learnt/people-care/index.md | 22 +++++++++++++++++++ 4 files changed, 35 insertions(+), 2 deletions(-) create mode 100644 content/books/things-i-learnt/people-care/index.md diff --git a/content/books/things-i-learnt/_index.md b/content/books/things-i-learnt/_index.md index f5e1d81..dca70b0 100644 --- a/content/books/things-i-learnt/_index.md +++ b/content/books/things-i-learnt/_index.md @@ -78,4 +78,5 @@ template = "section-contentless.html" * [Learn To Say No](say-no) * [Take Responsibility For The Use Of Your Code](responsible-code) * [Don't Tell It's Done When It's Not](not-done) + * [People Get Upset About Code And Architecture Quality 'Cause They Care](people-care) * [You'll Learn About Yourself The Hard Way](learn-about-yourself) diff --git a/content/books/things-i-learnt/learn-about-yourself/index.md b/content/books/things-i-learnt/learn-about-yourself/index.md index 30595f7..95da7d9 100644 --- a/content/books/things-i-learnt/learn-about-yourself/index.md +++ b/content/books/things-i-learnt/learn-about-yourself/index.md @@ -22,4 +22,14 @@ The worst part of it all? Very few people will tell you what you're doing before it's too late -- you'll get in trouble way before you could actually understand what you were doing. -{{ chapters(prev_chapter_link="/books/things-i-learnt/not-done", prev_chapter_title="Don't Tell It's Done When It's Not") }} +But, again, you'll get in trouble. + +And you _must_ learn about these events. Take the feedback as true, even if +you don't agree with it. I had my falls, and I always took it as something I +need to improve, even if later I said to my psychologist that I thought it was +unfair and biased -- mostly 'cause I'm the quiet guy that always took the +blows and never complained about, and people taking the flak from me were more +vocal and friendlier to the higher-ups. But, again, I took it as true, and did +my best to work on those problems. + +{{ chapters(prev_chapter_link="/books/things-i-learnt/people-care", prev_chapter_title="You'll Learn About Yourself The Hard Way") }} diff --git a/content/books/things-i-learnt/not-done/index.md b/content/books/things-i-learnt/not-done/index.md index a086956..ec53d13 100644 --- a/content/books/things-i-learnt/not-done/index.md +++ b/content/books/things-i-learnt/not-done/index.md @@ -30,4 +30,4 @@ On the other hand, if you say "Almost, but there is this thing that bothers me and I think it may give us a headache in the future", they will understand. So be clear and transparent about your work. -{{ chapters(prev_chapter_link="/books/things-i-learnt/responsible-code", prev_chapter_title="Take Responsibility For The Use Of Your Code", next_chapter_link="/books/things-i-learnt/learn-about-yourself", next_chapter_title="You'll Learn About Yourself The Hard Way") }} +{{ chapters(prev_chapter_link="/books/things-i-learnt/responsible-code", prev_chapter_title="Take Responsibility For The Use Of Your Code", next_chapter_link="/books/things-i-learnt/people-care", next_chapter_title="People Get Upset About Code And Architecture Quality 'Cause They Care") }} diff --git a/content/books/things-i-learnt/people-care/index.md b/content/books/things-i-learnt/people-care/index.md new file mode 100644 index 0000000..3585200 --- /dev/null +++ b/content/books/things-i-learnt/people-care/index.md @@ -0,0 +1,22 @@ ++++ +title = "Things I Learnt The Hard Way - People Get Upset About Code And Architecture Quality 'Cause They Care" +date = 2019-07-19 + +[taxonomies] +tags = ["en-au", "books", "things i learnt", "personal", "care"] ++++ + +At some point, you'll describe some solution/decision about some piece of +code or some architectural design and people will seem annoyed/pissed about +it. When people care about a product/code, they do that. + + + +Or maybe _you_ will get annoyed/pissed. + +I think one of the nicest compliments I ever got was "You're annoying 'cause +you care" when we left a meeting in which we decided to cut corners and do +things halfway to beat some deadline -- or just 'cause people were not in the +mood to do things in a more complete way. + +{{ chapters(prev_chapter_link="/books/things-i-learnt/not-done", prev_chapter_title="People Get Upset About Code And Architecture Quality 'Cause They Care", next_chapter_link="/books/things-i-learnt/learn-about-yourself", next_chapter_title="You'll Learn About Yourself The Hard Way") }} From a770b62894f5212017ae80606c0ffd65436dbc78 Mon Sep 17 00:00:00 2001 From: Julio Biason Date: Fri, 19 Jul 2019 19:49:42 -0300 Subject: [PATCH 3/3] New chapter: What how people react to you --- content/books/things-i-learnt/_index.md | 1 + .../learn-about-yourself/index.md | 2 +- .../things-i-learnt/watch-reactions/index.md | 31 +++++++++++++++++++ 3 files changed, 33 insertions(+), 1 deletion(-) create mode 100644 content/books/things-i-learnt/watch-reactions/index.md diff --git a/content/books/things-i-learnt/_index.md b/content/books/things-i-learnt/_index.md index dca70b0..5692e36 100644 --- a/content/books/things-i-learnt/_index.md +++ b/content/books/things-i-learnt/_index.md @@ -80,3 +80,4 @@ template = "section-contentless.html" * [Don't Tell It's Done When It's Not](not-done) * [People Get Upset About Code And Architecture Quality 'Cause They Care](people-care) * [You'll Learn About Yourself The Hard Way](learn-about-yourself) + * [Pay Attention On How People React To You](watch-reactions) diff --git a/content/books/things-i-learnt/learn-about-yourself/index.md b/content/books/things-i-learnt/learn-about-yourself/index.md index 95da7d9..b5a1529 100644 --- a/content/books/things-i-learnt/learn-about-yourself/index.md +++ b/content/books/things-i-learnt/learn-about-yourself/index.md @@ -32,4 +32,4 @@ blows and never complained about, and people taking the flak from me were more vocal and friendlier to the higher-ups. But, again, I took it as true, and did my best to work on those problems. -{{ chapters(prev_chapter_link="/books/things-i-learnt/people-care", prev_chapter_title="You'll Learn About Yourself The Hard Way") }} +{{ chapters(prev_chapter_link="/books/things-i-learnt/people-care", prev_chapter_title="You'll Learn About Yourself The Hard Way", next_chapter_link="/books/things-i-learnt/watch-reactions", next_chapter_title="Pay Attention On How People React To You") }} diff --git a/content/books/things-i-learnt/watch-reactions/index.md b/content/books/things-i-learnt/watch-reactions/index.md new file mode 100644 index 0000000..575bfcc --- /dev/null +++ b/content/books/things-i-learnt/watch-reactions/index.md @@ -0,0 +1,31 @@ ++++ +title = "Things I Learnt The Hard Way - Pay Attention On How People React To You" +date = 2019-07-19 + +[taxonomies] +tags = ["en-au", "books", "things i learnt", "personal", "reactions"] ++++ + +One way you can learn about yourself is to pay attention on how people react +to your actions. + + + +I have a "angry man resting face", which means that, even when I'm in a null +mood, it looks like I'm angry. + +I already had one meeting and which I started to ask something and noticed +that the other person move a bit back. That's when I realized that didn't +sound exactly how I meant. I had to add "I'm not saying what you're proposing +is wrong, I'm just confused." + +Also, I got a manager once come up with "I thought you were _the_ serious +person... till you suddenly started singing in the middle of a meeting"[^1]. + +You need to keep an eye on this. How is people reacting to your reactions? Are +they opening themselves to you or are they closing? + +[^1]: I have this "serious" problem that, depending on the word someone says, + I recall some lyrics and suddenly start singing it. + +{{ chapters(prev_chapter_link="/books/things-i-learnt/learn-about-yourself", prev_chapter_title="You'll Learn About Yourself The Hard Way") }}