New chapter: microaggressions

content/books/things-i-learnt/_index.md

@@ -82,3 +82,4 @@ template = "section-contentless.html"
 	* [You'll Learn About Yourself The Hard Way](learn-about-yourself)
 	* [Pay Attention On How People React To You](watch-reactions)
 	* [Beware of Toxic People](toxic-people)
+	* [Beware of Microaggressions](microaggressions)

content/books/things-i-learnt/microaggressions/index.md

@@ -0,0 +1,55 @@
++++
+title = "Things I Learnt The Hard Way - Beware of Microaggressions"
+date = 2019-07-23
+
+[taxonomies]
+tags = ["en-au", "books", "things i learnt", "personal", "microaggressions"]
++++
+
+Microaggressions are defined as "brief, everyday exchanges that send
+denigrating messages to certain individuals because of their group
+membership". The hardest part is that they don't sound aggressive.
+
+<!-- more -->
+
+Although I'm not part of an oppressed group, I've been microattacked more than
+once, by the same person.
+
+At some point, he mentioned that one couldn't talk bad about someone "around
+some people". That "someone" was a politician that got arrested for,
+basically, stealing from the country to promote a certain other company. The
+way that person said it, thought, made it seem I felt it was wrong to arrest
+the politician.
+
+Another time, I was casually saying that I shouldn't have come to work on my
+motorbike, although three forecast apps said it wouldn't rain. His comment: "I
+just looked outside".
+
+It may seem innocuous reading those, but if you look closely, all he was
+trying to do was do let me down. Oh no, I'm part of a group that thinks
+politicians shouldn't be arrested! Oh no, I'm not smart enough to look
+outside, while he is![^1].
+
+And those are really hard to fight, 'cause we aren't prepared to "get" those
+as real attacks.
+
+On top of that, HR people are not really prepared to understand those (it will
+always fall into the "it was just a joke"[^2] excuse and you'll be the
+troublemaker[^3]).
+
+The worst part? While you don't fully get it as an attack, it will slowly pile
+up. At some point, you may even burst into attacking the person back, with all
+the concentrated attacks in a single moment. And them _you_ will be seen as
+aggressive, not them.
+
+Better just stay away and avoid contact if possible.
+
+[^1]: In the end, when I had to leave work to go back home, it wasn't raining.
+
+[^2]: ... which is the pure definition of "Schoddinger's Asshole": Someone
+  that make a comment and, by the other people reaction, call it a joke as a
+  "get out of jail" card.
+
+[^3]: And I do wish you have a HR department that understand microaggressions.
+
+{{ chapters(prev_chapter_link="/books/things-i-learnt/toxic-people", prev_chapter_title="Beware of Toxic People") }}

content/books/things-i-learnt/toxic-people/index.md

@@ -31,4 +31,4 @@ realize that you may be seen as toxic 'cause [you don't understand yourself
 yet](/books/things-i-learnt/learn-about-yourself) and the way [people react to
 you](/books/things-i-learnt/watch-reactions).
 
-{{ chapters(prev_chapter_link="/books/things-i-learnt/watch-reactions", prev_chapter_title="Pay Attention On How People React To You") }}
+{{ chapters(prev_chapter_link="/books/things-i-learnt/watch-reactions", prev_chapter_title="Pay Attention On How People React To You", next_chapter_link="/books/things-i-learnt/microaggressions", next_chapter_title="Beware of Microaggressions") }}